She kidnaps a baby, then holds a funeral in a bar—complete with a tiny casket filled with the dead body of an alley dog—to fool the agent into thinking the baby died. “Darkest thing we’ve ever done,” her brother agrees.Frank Reynolds’ Little Beauties Several children are dropped off at an Irish bar in South Philly to participate in a beauty pageant that is under investigation.The play is about a princess who works in a coffee shop and is in love with a little boy.“Tiny boy, little boy, baby boy, I need you,” she sings. The feces is brought to a university science lab where they run into an economics major who enjoys looking at poop and is willing to analyze the stool sample.The Gang Buys a Boat A man convinces two of his friends to pool their life savings and buy a boat.He wants to take unsuspecting women into the open seas at night where they are unable to refuse his sexual advances “because of the implication.” He doesn’t plan to hurt anyone, the man explains to his concerned friend, he simply wants to lure women into a situation where they felt they had no other choice but to have sex with him “because of the implication” that they might be in danger.“Tiny boy, little boy, want to make love to you.” The little boy becomes a man when a dark and mysterious figure pays a troll to get into his bedroom and sneaks into his bed from behind, presumably raping him beneath his blanket. Whoever produced the poop consumed some newspaper, a bit of credit card, and wolf hair.Sweet Dee’s Dating a Retarded Person A young woman starts observing her new boyfriend’s behavior when her friends insist that he has a mental disability and keep score of how “retarded” or “not retarded” his actions are. This offers no conclusion as both men apparently have the same diet.
Soon, the pair are sitting on a stoop, drinking cans of beer out of paper bags and singing along with a boombox blasting Biz Markie’s “Just a Friend.” In the middle of the afternoon.While at the base of the show’s appeal is its absurdity, in some ways, the characters of It’s Always Sunny are realistic.Despite desperate attempts to convince their exes, high school friends and foes and, above all, themselves that they are smart and successful, the reality is they are none of those things.She is told to eat cat food, huff glue, and drink beer because the combination creates a “weird chemical reaction” that will render her so sick and tired that she’ll fall asleep.(This is the only way to drown out the noise of the fifty stray cats that cry outside his window.)Sweet Dee Gets Audited The IRS catches onto a woman’s scheme to claim a child she gave birth to as a surrogate as a dependent.